This chapter MSTed by Jo

***The ambushed MSTers mooch slowly into the theatre, Ant and Dec keeping close together, followed at a cautious distance by Ron, wand out.***

ANT: Go on then Donnelly-san, tell me all about Digimon.

DEC: Haven't a clue.

(Or rather, I haven't a clue ;))
RON: What kind of magic is this then?

DEC: One track mind these wizards like.

ANT: *to Ron* No magic, just crap fic, read fic, make fun of fic, try not to go mad in the process.

DEC: MEEEP! *sings* IF YOU LIKE A LOT OF CHOCOLATE ON YOUR BISCUIT JOIN *normal* the East Acton Geographical Society. *collapses in chair*

ANT: Declan's still working on the last one.

A/N: Nothing else to say except I based this chapter on an episode of Pokemon I didn’t see but a good friend told me about.

ANT: Scary when you're on the same knowledge level as the author...

DEC: Don't put yourself down man.

THANKS! The little outline gave me a great idea. I don’t own that Pokie ep. Like I said in the disclaimer, I don’t own anything else that comes along either. Now the chap

DEC: Jolly good chap what what?

RON: Smashing fun what?

starts with the evil leader of Team Rocket Mon (that’s Myotismon, not Jessie) versus Giovanni’s army-like brigade of RocketMen.

ANT: Evil Elton Johns?

Also, Giovanni becomes addicted to that certain food Wisconsin is famous for… And I think you’ll find the title quite interesting.

ANT: Shows you what thought did...

DEC: Saracsm much?

ANT: Hungry, hungover, stranded in space...

DEC: Good point.

Chapter 6

Getting a Bit Drowzee

RON: Meh?

DEC: *proud* Look, he's got the hang of it already!

ANT: *shakes head*

“MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!” laughed Myotismon, the real leader of Team Rocket Mon.

DEC: I'm lost.

ANT: *looks at watch* Three seconds, a new satellite record.

RON: Damn, I left the prize money in my other cloak.

“No one gets past me and gets away with it! Well, with the exception of Jenny here.”

“Hi!” Jenny peeked around from behind his cape.

RON: Humour. Wicked.

She grabbed Demidevimon by the wing and ran off. “And I didn’t clean your boots!” she yelled back.

ANT: *as Jenny* AND I spat in your baked beans!

DEC: *as Jenny* That'll teach you to sleep with my canary!

ANT: You have issues with canaries now?

DEC: Those yellow feathers haunt my dreams...

RON: *edging away from Dec* This might make more sense if we'd read the rest of it.

ANT: *diving over Declan, clamping his hand over Ron's mouth* Kid, are you INSANE?

RON: mmmph mnnnph! mmmimvh!

DEC: He's a Gryffindor.

ANT: That's a yes then...

Myotismon, not one bit upset about the fact Jenny didn’t shine and polish those bat and skull decorations on his boots, started to attack. “Leave now, intruders,” he said calmly. “Leave and no one gets attacked.”

ANT: So he attacks by warning them and giving them the chance to get away so they can come up with a plan to defeat him later...

DEC: Went to the same evil despot school as all the Bond villians.

ANT: Aaaah.

“Who are you

RON: Snape's more attractive brother

and what have you done with Jessie?”

DEC: Well...

ANT: *clamps hand over Dec's mouth* Ixn-ay on the smut-lay. Kid in the room!

RON: Never stopped you on chums...

ANT/DEC EH?!

RON *smug* Harry taught me all I know, anyway, you should hear some of Fred and George's limericks, it's amazing what they can make rhyme with 'muggle'.

asked RocketMan #2. “For that matter, what are you?”

ANT: Ospray housing!

RON: Random.

ANT: Thanks.

DEC: Also stolen...

ANT: Shut up!

“Jessie is second in line for the throne of ruler in the digital world as my less superior partner,”

DEC: She keeps trying to put the crown on her foot.

said Myotismon. “She chose it because I have the charisma of a real villain.”

ANT: Angel's gonna be pissed.

DEC: Obtuse 'Buffy' reference?

ANT: I'm ashamed of it though...

“AND SHE HAS A CRUSH ON HIM!” Demidevimon yelled breathlessly, followed by Jenny saying, “Come on you PITA.” “WHAT’S A PITA?”

RON: Really tasty with pumpkin and kiwifruit filling.

DEC: You are a strange child.

RON: You're the one who dressed up as a garden goblin for a living.

Jenny faintly replied out of earshot, “A pain in the @$$.”

DEC: '@$$'?! Either swear or don't, but don't cheat!

ANT: How the hell did you say that?

DEC: I took a corespondance course in Idiot...

“You don’t scare us!” lied RocketMan #2, withdrawing his firearm full of missiles

DEC: From the bank that likes to say 'KILL!!!'

and things worse than bullets.

RON: PJ and Duncan albums

ANT/DEC: *sigh*

The other RocketMen hesitantly did the same. “Come on, RocketMen! FIRE!” He aimed two where Jenny and Demidevimon were, then shot the rest at MM.

ANT: *as Rocketman #2* CANDY SHOULDN'T TALK! FIRE AT WILL!!

DEC: Not fair, first Gareth gets all the attention... now you bloody blow him up!

RON: Subtle.

DEC: Thanks Anne. You're not really THAT scary.

ANT: It's the fic, he'll be fine once we get out.

RON: Tell that to my shoes...

DEC: *petting Ron's trainers* Nice kitty!

There came the scratchy sound of pain

RON: Which daft git tried to play pain on the decks?

as Demidevimon hit the ground because he was hit by two of the missiles.

ANT: And there was me thinking he was doing his Jurgen Klinsman impression.

MM was hit, but he wasn’t hurt or anything.

DEC: That's a relief, being anything can seriously take the shine off your day.

Because he was a champion digimon who had the power of an ultimate

RON: An ultimate what?

ANT: Teaspoon!

DEC: Kumquat!

ANT: Curling tongs!

RON: Moose!

ANT: Now you're just being daft, man.

and more than just a few missiles would never be able to faze him.

DEC: More than just a few..? MEEEEEP!!! *sings* YOU ARE MY SUNSHINE! MY ONLY *normal* half price sale, saturday only!

ANT: There there mate, 's ok.

“GRISLY WING!”

ANT: *camp* Well you're not so hot yourself sweetheart.

Myotismon responded to the firearm.

RON: *as Myotismon* They are firing missiles at me, so I will yell at the gun.

DEC: Zen villainry.

All those bats with him flew out and circled around the RocketMen.

ANT: Who all played "Your Song" at top speed and knocked out their radar.

The RocketMen forgot about Myotismon for two seconds

RON *random rocket man* 1... Nice here innit... 2... OH SHIIIT!

and started firing their missiles at his bats until RocketMan #2

DEC: *as RocketMan #2* I'm fighting this... this... thing! And they can't even give me a name?

RON: Maria-Belle?

realized MM was still there an he’d attack again.

RON: Spelling riff?

ANT: Cheap and tacky.

RON: Your department then.

“Come on!” he shouted. “FIRE, ROCKETMEN!”

DEC: From a cannon.

ANT/RON *singing* They fly through the air with the greatest of...

DEC: SPLAT!

The RocketMen #3 through #16

ANT: RocketMen #17, #18 and #19 having had more sense and hidden in the loo

fired about half their ammo at Myotismon. Every missile and whatever other ammo there was

ANT: Pianos,

DEC: Garden chairs,

RON: Crookshanks.

zoomed out, hit MM, exploded, and then didn’t seem to do anything to faze him.

ANT: Faze, no. Leave dirty great holes in, possibly.

“He’s invincible!” exclaimed RocketMan #9, dropping his firearm and running away from the scene. RocketMen #15 and #16 did the same. RocketMen #2, #3 and #4 picked up the firarms and decided to use both of them.

RON: To make a sculpture entitled "A prawn for my master."

“Fire double time!” commanded RocketMan #2.

ANT: *Wyclef* One time!

DEC: *Wyclef* Two time!

He shot missiles out of both

RON: Nostrils

firearms, much like #4 and #3. They thought that method would work.

ANT: Unfortunately the only thing capable of killing a... Dec?

DEC: Digimon...

ANT: Digimon, aye. IS....

RON: Dale Winton's underpants

Unfortunately for the RocketMen, MM shielded himself with his cape against the double-time. Not that he needed to, but then again…

DEC: *MM* It looks so pretty against the explosions!

“CRIMSON LIGHTNING!”

RON: Sounds like a hair metal band.

DEC: The forty-seven minute guitar solo of death!

Myotismon used his second attack on all the RocketMen and the aircraft. All the RocketMen got hit and started doubling over in

DEC: Custard!

burning pain.

“Come on, let’s get out of here!” RocketMan #2 exclaimed, running away from the scene and hurling his firearm behind him at MM and picking up RocketMan #1, still out from the Demi Dart.

ALL: AAAAAAHH!

DEC: Wondered where he got to.

RON: You have too much time on your hands.

DEC: *sings* Hands that do DISHES!!! can be soft as *normal* the A47

“This guy’s practically invincible!” The others did the same as RocketMan #2.

ANT: They all picked up RocketMan #1?

DEC: *random RocketMan* Hate to break it to ya, #1 old pal, but the diet ain't working.

“You RocketMen are truly overrated,” said MM,

ANT: He's obviously never heard...

RON: Is this gonna be another Elton John joke?

ANT: *shamefully* Aye...

holding the dropped firearm and brandishing it. “And it just isn’t a fight without me finishing you off.”

RON: *as random RocketMan* Oh it is, no honestly, you won, yay you!

The Rocketmen stopped in their tracks, afraid that if they moved they would die.

DEC: *sing-song voice* Because a giiiiaaant pizza had just come through the roof!

RON: This is going to take therapy.

MM narrowed his eyes and shot a beam of his Crimson lightning out of the firearm, finishing off RocketMen #1 and #2. There was a small explosion, and all that was left of RocketMen #1 and #2 were their Team Rocket badges, gold with the red “R” on them.

DEC: And there goes another law of physics!

ANT: The list of sacrifices in the name of bad fic gets longer by the day.

DEC: Any chance of adding me-meep to meepching!-it? MEEP!

RON: Possibly...

RocketMan #14, who was currently last in line, picked up the slightly charred badges. His eyes welled up with tears. “Poor Mike and Kenji…”

ANT: *as ghost of RocketMan #1* Oh that's right! Stingy bastards, only give you a name when you snuff it!

Then seeing Myotismon with the firearm, he sprinted right away with the Team Rocket badges tightly enclosed in his hands, closely following the other RocketMen.

RON: *as Rocketman #14* OWWIE! Hot badges, comin through!

MM threw the firearm into the air and used his Crimson Lightning to destroy it.

ANT: Showoff.

The parts dematerialized in a flash.

RON: Digimon disposals, weapons removed in a flash!

“Don’t worry, the RocketMen are gone,” Gatomon assured Jessie, who had scrunched herself into a corner of an out-of-the-way room. “The master knew they were intruders so he destroyed them.”

RON: *as Gatomon* Which was surprising, since he usually invites intruders in for fairy cakes.

“Because he didn’t want them to find me, right?” asked Jessie hopefully.

ANT: Come on Dec, you can get a lewd joke outta that!

DEC: meeeep.

RON: Dec?

DEC: meeEP! LEGS!

ANT: He tried...

RON: *Takes off hat, whistles the last post*

ANT: Very funny.

“No, because they’re intruders!” Gatomon exclaimed. “Are you blind? He hates intruders! He either destroys them or makes them work for him. I was no intruder. I came by my own free will because I was misled. And you were the same as me.”

RON: *Turning wand on self* AVADA KEDAVRA!

ANT *dives under seat, pulling Dec with him*

RON: Dammit, not so much as a toothache.

DEC: *Looking out from under seat* Can I play with Ron's wand?

ANT *proud* He's still got it! *thinks* Eeeuuu! *slaps Dec*

“What about Jenny?” asked Jessie. “What’s with that girl?”

ANT: *hauling Dec back up and sitting down* A side order of fries, a cherry coke, and this week only, a free pencil sharpener!

DEC: Pointy!

“Meh, dunno, but I think the master likes her. Felt sorry for her being out there looking for her poor lost pokemon and stuff so she was- what the hell? Demidevimon, what happened to YOU?”

RON: I saved a bus full of orphaned refugees, prevented world war three, invented a new type of cheese and found a cure for George W. Bush. How was your day?

Demidevimon flew right in, bruised from the missile. Actually, Jenny carried him into the room.

ANT: Hardly flying then.

RON: The fic's arguing with itself!

DEC: I like monkeys. No I don't!

RON: Nearly a riff there, well done!

She wasn’t hurt.

ANT/RON: Pity!

“I was protecting the kid from those RocketMen,” said Demidevimon. “Don’t want her hurt. I’ve been wanting to commit digicide ever since I came to this place, and it’s the only way to do so.

ANT: Wait... he can only commit suicide by protecting Jenny? That doesn't make any sense!

RON: Whoopie. Find a bit that makes sense and I'll hang the flags out.

So I was making both of us happy. She wants to be healthy cuz she’s the new kid, and besides, Myotismon- er, Master Myotismon hates both of us. Red, he thinks us servants are dirt. Lower than dirt. Worms, even…”

“I think it’s actually Demidevimon who likes Jenny,” Jessie muttered to Gatomon.

“…And not to mention he’s the head evil dude,”

RON: Dude! It's like totally despot-tastic! He's like, powerful and stuff.

ANT: Dude! That is like, so heavy!

Demidevimon continued. “He’s the leader of Team Rocket Mon which I got in because the Bakemon refused. Pure chance, I tell ya, Red…”

ANT: Is it me, or has Demidevimon turned into Huggy Bear?

RON: *as Boy Lard* Target audience!

“Or what if the master really does like Jenny?” asked Jessie. “What if I went into all this trouble to join Team Rocket Mon for nothing? Jenny, could you kindly get out of our faces and take Demidevimon with you?”

DEC: *as Jenny* Sure, I don't mind taking the annyoying digithing and heading out into uncertain dangers...

ANT: *hugs Dec*

DEC: CAT! You were never *this* friendly on Earth!

RON: I've just had a vision of the author... and she's laughing.

“…and again. I tell you, Red, there’s nothing that makes you wish you never worked with him (or for him, in my case) than dangling over a pit of flames by one foot.”

ANT: *disentangling himself from Dec* Really? That was what made me sign up, the whole prospect of pit-dangling...

Jenny took him away and walked out of the room. “And another thing, Red, he favors blondies like Jen here just because that’s his hair color. You’re better off with your old boss. Hey, where are you taking me?”

“To get your brains fixed,” said Jenny.

ANT: TAKE DEC TOO!

DEC: BANANA!!!

“Don’t bother; he’s always like that!” Gatomon shouted as Jenny and Demidevimon were out of sight. “Hey Jess, shouldn’t you be making your little appearance in that big city tonight?”

RON: *generic announcer voice* Live from New York, Jessie, the human manhole cover!

Leviathan City, named for its leviathan size,

ANT: Nooooo?! *SERIOUSLY*?! There was me thinking it was named for Esther Rantzen.

had the largest population ever in Jhoto.

RON: As that's a tiny *fictional* area of Japan, we're guessing it's not much to write home about...

ANT: Shame, Dinky City has a nice ring to it.

It had a pokemon gym that used different elemental pokemon to fight, like Eevees evolved with moon stones and Clefables evolved with water and fire stones and stuff like that.

DEC: Stuff?

ANT: Y'know, fighting thingies and whatever.

RON: They used these doofers on them to make them you know...

DEC: *Hides under chair, whimpering*

The badge from Leviathan Gym was considered a real honor.

ANT: It gets you 50% off a milkshake in Burger King

“This is the best place to steal pokemon from,”

RON: A pokemon Gym? Why not Sainsburys?

Domino informed Erika as they crawled around in the gigantic air vent. “I can’t believe I have to tote YOU around,” she complained.

ANT: *as Erika* Well, since you asked so nicely, I'll get out of the rucksack then?

“Aw, quit your complaining,” said Erika. “They know about Mondo and James, of Butch and Casidy, but definitely not Erika and Domino, a partnership named for Erika Domino, the famous cheese thief and gangster from Wisconsin!”

RON: Ah! They mock us with strange American humour.

DEC: *sing-song* Stolen stolen stolen!

ANT: Probably, but no-one ever gets the stuff I watch so nyyaaah

RON: Oooh, you tapped into the author! What was it like?

ANT: Freaky... I had a sudden urge to kiss Dec...

DEC: Not on a first date, sailor.

“Shut up,” said Domino, slapping Erika.

RON: Oooh, bitchfight!

ANT: The twins have taught you well, Obi-Ron

DEC: The smut is with him!

“See this rose?” She held out her black rose. “This is what’s gonna help us catch all the pokemon here.”

“It’s just a rose,” said Erika.

ANT: So... it's a geranium...

RON: Tulip, I thought...

“Not just any rose,” said Domino. The rose glowed and shot out a laser beam. A crash echoed from inside the vent. Unfortunately, every citizen in Leviathan City had turned up for the biggest battle: Gary Oak (“That’s Mister Oak to you, miss ditsy author lady!”)

RON: Uh-huh... her characters are insulting her...

ANT: That's the one bit so far I found realistic.

versus the gym leaders Ray and Amber (brother and sister who evolved their Eevee with a moon stone.)

DEC: MEEEP! Basil Exposition, British Inteligance!

ANT: A Riff! I think he's getting better!

DEC: *stroking Ant's forehead* I love you, Lurch.

RON: Completely cured.

The battle was interrupted by the loud crashing noise.

RON: *generic sports announcer* We intterupt this battle to bring you "The Nine o' clock Noise."

The spectators looked around for the source of the noise and found nothing suspicious even above the intricately-patterned glass roof or in the rare plants or even behind the giant moon stones.

ANT: The art of making a perfectly fine sentance entirely redundant.

RON: The girl's a natural... you think if I set her to work on my potions essay she could make Snape's head explode?

ANT: Gotta be worth the try...

“I can handle it,” said Gary. “I have my Nidoking and my exceptional skills as a REAL pokemon trainer. Too bad Ash never made it this far. Oh well. I could have whooped his ash!” Then he laughed at his own joke.

DEC: Glad somebody's laughing Jim...

ANT: Star Trek? Spike's gonna die...

Meanwhile, in the air vent…

ANT: Sven Goran-Eriksson has just headbutted Cilla Black. He goes through to round two against Captain Kirk.

“Sweet!” Erika exclaimed. “Now how do we get into the pokemon sanctuary to steal the pokemon? Who’s got the best pokemon around here?”

RON: Ash, which negates all laws of physics faster than this fic ever could.

ANT: Actually his only decent pokemon now belongs to Declan...

DEC: Pretty little sparky mouse!

“Let’s take Amber’s,” said Domino. “She’s the younger one and won’t know what hit her!”

ANT: Lennox Lewis, in the third round.

For emphasis on “hit,” she banged her rose on the bottom of the air vent, unaware it was liable to explode.

RON: She only shot a missile out of it a paragraph or so ago, and now she's developed amnesia?

ANT: She's kinder on her characters than her readers...

“Then we’ll come back for Ray’s. I hear Ray has the best Drowzee on the whole damn planet!” She hit the rose on the bottom of the vent again.

DEC: I hear the sound of impending doom... or a girraffe.

KABOOM!!!! The rose went off in an explosion to end all explosions.

ANT: Peace! Peace has broken out! All the firepower in the world has been destroyed! REJOICE! Or it could just be a bad case of exaggeration...

Erika and Domino fell right out the blasted vent and right in the middle of the gym battle, covered in dust. They started coughing as the smoke cleared and the battle spectators watched with bugged-out eyes.

“What the-“ Ray interjected as he saw Erika and Domino standing there. “Are you part of Team Rocket?”

“Yeah!” Erika exclaimed as she came to her senses. And she still knew she was an impostor.

ANT: Erika knows who she is! WOWEE!

RON: Don't get smug, Dec now thinks he's a smurf...

“Prepare for trouble!”

“And make it double!”

“To our boss we create a sensation!

“To steal all pokemon in the nation!”

“To steal and enslave all digimon, too!”

“You better not fight or we’ll terrorize you!”

“Erika!”

“Domino!”

“Team Rocket, making the biggest cities uproar in riots and fuss!”

“All pokemon exist for the glory of us!”

DEC: PSYCHE!

ANT: That was beyond riffing.

RON: We hope you all joined us in just staring in disbelief.

The gym was filled with screaming and panic.

RON: *random spectator* NOOO! The poetry! AAARRGH!

Even Ray’s eyes were starting to bug out in fear.

ANT: Ray's eyes evolved into cockroaches and escaped.

RON: It was later disovered 'moonstones' were actually uranium waste.

“You ain’t half bad, Erika,” said Domino. “Now steal Amber’s pokemon while I distract her and Ray with my rose!” She produced her black rose, which had snapped near the flower part. “MY ROSE!”

ANT: *as Domino, sulky* MUMMY! The naughty bullies broke my iddle rosie!

“Do you still want me to steal the pokemon?” asked Erika.

RON: Duhhh... nah, lets just go for coffee.

“YES!” Domino shrieked.

Erika ran off to bag Amber’s moon stone Eevee, known as Luneon.

ANT: Gaah... that was even more obvious than Remus Lupin.

RON: Obvious?

ANT: Come off it, a name like that and it takes you the guts of the book to work out he's a Werewolf?

RON: Book?

Then she ran off to collect all the pokeballs she had. Luneon squirmed to get out of the bag, but the bag was made of a pelt of a Garurumon’s fur (don’t ask.) Inpenetrable and will never get ripped.

ANT: McGuffin-mon!

DEC: Media student author showing off with the Hitchcock... *sings* DAY-OH! *normal* This is getting annoying...

“Here!” Erika exclaimed, throwing the bag with the squirming Luneon into Domino’s hands.

Domino was about to ask why Erika hadn’t collected the pokemon sooner when the lights went off. Everything in the gym went silent. It was so silent one could hear a pin drop even when they were in the farthest-away bleacher.

ANT: So it was silent then?

RON: Apart from the weeping...

There was a large crash, and the smell of smoke filled everyone’s nostrils and the smoke stung their eyes. Some coughing was also heard.

ANT: Funny... do you think the two might be connected?

Over the coughing, there was another crash, and the scream of a pokemon. “DROOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWW…”

Before the lights came back on, Erika and Domino decided to make their escape with the pokeballs and the Luneon.

RON: *as Erika* But if we have a head start, it takes all the fun out of it!

When the lights came back on, all of Amber’s pokemon were missing. So was Ray’s Drowzee. And glass shards were all over the floor.

RON: Might have had something to do with Team Rocket, but we can't say for sure.

“I don’t understand it,”

ANT: Pokemon thieves. All the pokemon are gone. We all wonder why.

RON: Haiku!
DEC: Bless you.

said red-and-yellow haired Ray (his hair looked like sun rays), scratching his head.

RON: And scraping the barrel...

“Those pokemon thieves couldn’t have made off with my Drowzee, it was too big to fit in that bag they were-“

“DROOOOWWWWWZZZZZEEEEEEEEEEE!” Sleep waves flew right out at everyone, even Gary and the gym leaders. And Nidoking.

RON: Everyone. And Nidoking.

ANT: *as Nidoking, sobbing* I'm a non-pokemon!

DEC: Heh, nonmon.

ANT: *gently* Declan?

DEC: *manic* AND IT'S PETER BEARDSLEY! PETER BEARDSELY TO LINFORD CHRISTIE, CHRISTIE OVERTAKEN AT THE FINAL BEND BY RED RUM AND THE GROUND FORCE TEAM! *stands up, does pirrouette, falls over*

ANT: Declan?

DEC: *groggy* Where am I?

RON: *snorts* That old get out...

[shaddup!]

They drifted off to sleep in a sea of confusion and chaos and plenty of questions about Erika and Domino. Finally, when the waves stopped, everyone’s eyes slowly opened and remained only half-open. They all appeared stiff,

DEC: Heh heh, so Jessie's nearb...

ANT: *clamping his hand over Dec's mouth* Good to have you back mate.

even the Nidoking and the rest of Gary’s and Ray’s pokemon. Erika and Domino saw the entire thing, forgetting about their grudges held against each other.

RON: *as Domino* I really hate her, she's a sl... oooh, snoring!

“Why do they look so possessed?” asked Erika, not knowing they would get their answer soon.

“Hail Lord Myotismon,” said every human in the gym at the same time.

“NIDOKING,” said Nidoking. “NIDO NIDO KING NIDOKING NIDO KINGNIDOKING! *ROAR*!”

DEC: *translating* I am SO getting a new agent.

“What the?…” asked Domino, just as confused as Erika was. “Oh, it must be Drowzee. Cassidy and Butch tried this on pokemon but it wasn’t too effective as this one is.”

DEC: *eyes start to glaze*

ANT: *hurriedly* She meant 'as effective'. It was just a simple typo, wasn't it Ron? *nudges Ron*

RON: Hunh? Oh, yeh, just a slip of the fingers, really.

DEC: I tried that excuse on Cat once, still got the scar.

ANT/RON: *sigh of relief*

“Look!” Erika pointed out. The humans were throwing their pokeballs, out of which came

RON: Celery!

pokemon. The flying pokemon took the non-flying ones and flew out of the broken window on the top of the gym.

“Our offering of pokemon to you, lord and master Myotismon,” said Amber. “I am so sorry that I have none to give. Two thieves stole them from me.”

There was a pause.

ANT: ......

RON: This pause was brought to you by agreement with The Chudley Cannons and Newcastle United FC

Then the humans of Leviathan City stiffly walkied out of the gym and right onto the street. From there, they walked along the road to Jhoto’s central Jamassia City, stopping at Orbidian and whatever other cities might be on the way.

DEC: Take a left at Over Thonder, a right at 'oh, you know, where they make the kaledioscopes' and you're there.

“Mental,” remarked Domino.

ANT: Pot calling kettle!

“Look. Selfish humans.” Gary pointed to Erika and Domino. “They look like they have pokemon and digimon.”

“Let’s get out of here!” Erika exclaimed, climbing into the same kind of aircraft the RocketMen had traveled in. Domino followed her with the bag of stolen pokemon. “Blast off!” she told the pilot.

“Right-o!” Mondo saluted and smiled. He was also an experienced pilot.

DEC: *As Mondo* 'Blast off?' Hmm... fire one... similar, let's try it!

He made the aircraft shoot up into the air and zoom out of sight.

RON: In fact, he flew it!

“The master will be angry at us,” said Ray from the ground. He, Amber and Gary led the mob towards Jamassia City. For they were the ones who were the center of everyone’s attention before that unfortunate disaster.

ANT: For it is written.

DEC: Where?

ANT: Here, unfortunately.

“To wherever they’re headed to.”

“They were with Team Rocket,” said Gary.

“To the Team Rocket headquarters, then,” said Ray. He led the entire mob towards the Team Rocket headquarters. Fortunately, for Team Rocket, traveling by foot took a long time. But this mob seemed to walk too fast to actually be walking.

DEC: They were doing the breaststroke!

ANT: *pokes Dec*

DEC: SWIMMING MAN!!

ANT: Just making sure.

“Pokemon, sir,” said Erika,

RON: *as Giovanni* Same to you, ungrateful bitch!

dumping the pokeballs and the frightened Luneon on Giovanni’s immense desk in the headquarters. “And one special Luneon.”

“Ah, the legendary one belonging to honorary Elite Four members Ray and Amber Soleye, all the way from Mount Moon,”

DEC: Give us another paragraph, we can pilage the entire solar system!

said Giovanni, looking through an encyclopedia.

ANT: No fair, hiding 'Playmon' in there!

DEC: *shudders*

“Excuse me, sir, but why are you reading that encyclopedia? Are you reading about Wisconsin?” asked Domino, reading over Giovanni’s shoulder. Yes, he was looking on information on Erika Domino.

“Why, yes, but whenever I read it to look up info on Erika Domino, I seem to get a craving for cheese for some strange reason. Can you bring me a cheese platter?” he asked Domino.

“Of course, anything for my boss,” said Domino, running off to get a platter of cheese. She came back looking possessed and not holding anything.

RON: One whiff of danish blue will do that to you.

“Where’s my CHEESE?” Giovanni whined like a little kid as Domino took all the pokeballs and grabbed Luneon by the tail. “What are you doing, Domino? Ah, going to lock them up for me, are you? Perfect! Now give me my cheese this instant!”

ANT: Would it help him if we gave Domino a sign saying "I AM POSESSED"?

DEC: Only if it was made of stilton...

Domino left, obviously not caring. Erika followed to see what Domino was up to.

RON: Level 347 of Tetris

“Aw, heck, I’ll get it myself,” said Giovanni, standing up to get himself some cheese. Domino was the only one who would be possessed, according to the Team Rocket Mon’s plan. The others? Just some competition for Team Rocket Mon. The twerps and digi-destined weren’t going to be involved in the Drowzee thing, either.

DEC: I'm not actually going to riff this blatant exposition, it saves me the horror of the other chapters.

RON: *seemingly to thin air* Now you're just getting lazy...

JO/DEC: Very sorry... *plopping noise*

DEC: EEEU! Her mind... EEEUU!

MM and Jessie witnessed all the goings-on from MM’s viewing orb. Gatomon was next to Jessie. Jenny and Demidevimon were looking into the room suspiciously.

ANT: *as Jenny* It has... WALLS... and... and... a DOOR!

RON: *as Demidevimon* Evil! EVIIIL!

“I’m so glad I thought of this,” said Jessie. “I mean, Butch and Cassidy messed up big time with their Drowzee incident, but I made sure the Drowzee was useful this time!”

“That’s why you’re the second most important part of Team Rocket Mon,” Gatomon purred from her feet.

DEC: After the poet.

ANT: *as Jessie* Dammit, I thought I was popular!

“I really need to set everyone straight,” said Jenny from outside. “I ought to make it so Demidevimon is brought up from the position of lowly servant to top henchmen. And so Jessie the ultimate PITA leaves this place. And so do I!”

ANT: If she just wants out, what the hell does she care what happens to Jessie?

DEC: When you've got PMS, you want the whole world to suffer...

ANT/RON: *stare blankly*

DEC: ...I've heard...

“Me too,” said Demidevimon.

“And I know just how to do it,” said Jenny. “Give me a moment alone with the master and Jessie fortunately leaving the room.”

ANT: Jessie leaving the room where?

DEC: At the pound, to be destroyed.

The next day, Domino was missing and Giovanni had become a cheese-aholic. Addicted to cheese.

RON: Thank you for clearing that up, I thought he'd gone green.

All because of reading an encyclopedia article about Wisconsin.

RON: Was that how you got people to buy your records then?

ANT/DEC: Shhhhhh!

“ERIKA!” Goivanni yelled on a mouthfull of cheddar cheese. “Have you seen Domino?”

Erika skidded in breathlessly. “No,” she answered. “More cheese curds, sir?”

“Why yes,” said Giovanni. “And where exactly did she lock up that Luneon?”

“I don’t think she locked it up,” said Erika. “She didn’t, as a matter of fact.

ANT: I don't know anything... wait, yes I do!

DEC: *as generic infomercial announcer* MST3K 1/2 accepts no responsibilty for schizophrenia develped as a direct result of reading this fic.

RON: We will however take credit if it gets you a date

DEC: And we want her sister's number.

She took it outside and threw it into the air. A ghost caught it and all the pokeballs and flew off with every one of those things.”

“I knew this would happen,”

ANT: Then why didn't he stop it?

DEC: And save us the torture of another pokefic? When has Gio ever been that good to us?

said Giovanni, stuffing a hunk of cheese into his mouth. “Mph bftt muhfuhs oh gonn uhn oh uh hup luhn-

RON: He doesn't know it yet, but he just ordered three thousand Aibo's and a crate of sushi

“ he swallowed. (That meant “My best members are gone and all I have left…”) “are the bumblers. Butch and Cassidy have lost their spark. And they used to be my best members.”

ANT: Which is why we see Jessie and James in every epsionde of Pokemon and not them, huh?

“Do you think?” Erika wondered to herself.

“Yes, I knew this was punishment for not giving them some of my cheez whiz when they wanted me to. Or possibly if you hadn’t come along.” He turned around in his chair, about to eat a few slices of American Cheese. “And by the way, don’t steal my cheese!”

“I won’t steal that crap you’re eating now,” said Erika as she walked off. She was talking about the American cheese.

DEC: Oh! Cause that's what he was eating! And I only have two active braincells and couldn't figure that out for myself!

ANT: Don't take it personally Declan.

DEC: The fic mocks me, I can feel it.

Yes, this was all because Jessie mouthed off to Giovanni and said she could build a better villain team.

ANT: So not because someone threw half of Digimon into the Pokemon world then?

James wouldn’t have been partnered up with Mondo. Butch and Cassidy would still be at the top. Domino wouldn’t be possessed. Erika wouldn’t have been there. All the RocketMen would have still been alive. And Giovanni wouldn’t be stuffing his face with cheese.

DEC: A tragedy indeed, but it makes a change from vodka.

*Blaaart!*

ANT: We survived!

*All run for the exit*